nine Eleven

walking passed the chain linked fences, and construction zones... I feel the energy, I feel the pitch black -gaping open, and the tears cried here, the World bleeding... and maybe thirty minutes later, standing inside the building next to it, and looking out the window from a few stories up.. looking down towards the Ground.. I see small groups of workers patching up the buildings and their scaffolds next to it.. The time is midsummer of 2004, and I am in manhattan, new york.  My cousins getting married in central park in the next few days, and my parents decided to drag me along with my ipod and camera.  They decide its alright for me to explore alone, so I bring my phone and somehow end up at Ground Zero.

   I was coming out of my room, back in the second story of my parents house.  I was on the otherside of the hall, and turning my way to the left... heading down the stairs.  My sister, Jamie.. she asks me if I've 'heard anything'... I tell her I havent.. not fully knowing what shes talking about.. She motions for me to the tv that was in the "office" room of the house.. I look at the tv and see smoke coming from a pretty important building.. the World trade center.  Jamie said it had just hit, and they were trying to see if it was an accident or not.. We sat in silence just watching a piece of property, a monument, an achievement just blazing in flames... It was around 7am my time.. I knew this was happening in new york, and even in the car ride to the school that day, my mom had the radio on so we could listen to it as it unfolded, and the planes un-accounted for, and later the one that was crashed in the field... At the time it was too early to apply all the flight numbers to the actual crashes, it was just too early in the day.. and at school one of my teachers explained that its possible to faint when jumping from that high.. something about all the air going through your nose...

   Today im just thinking about that day.. september the 11th, two thousand and one.  It changed my country forever.  And it hurts -just as much today, some decade or so later... it hurts to see the Towers on fire, it hurts to see the people jumping... and as I sit here, I wonder if we've spread enough peace and democracy to reconcile for this day, and the innocent sons and daughters, moms and dads that never came home... I wonder if we've done enough to honor them, and their fallen children.  I wonder if we've helped enough, if we gave enough to their memory